My body is a know-it-all and it always knows everything before I do. It knows when it’s time to stop and when to push on. While it’s great about letting me know where we stand, I am terrible about listening to the cues.
Once upon a time….
Okay, it was yesterday. My body clinched up tight. My shoulders got stiff. Tension radiated through my neck. My tailbone throbbed. My temples pulsated. And I was sure that the veins in my scalp were going to rupture.
It was bad. Real bad.
The situation that brought on this orchestra of discomfort has been going on for a very long time. I am not confused about the next step, because there is only one solution. Yet, I continue to allow it to happen, again and again.
My body is so patient, but it’s also tired. Tired of shouting at me, knowing that its message falls on not-so-deaf ears. It has put up, endured, tolerated, and suffered. It has been vigilant and considerate, but it has grown weary.
I don’t need to listen to what I already know is true. I have toiled in earnest and know I must bravely take the next step. I’m scared shitless. I have no idea what will happen. But the pain of staying where I am has eclipsed the fear of what might not materialize.
The thoughts that have held me hostage in a place I no longer wish to be are not real. I may not be a fortune-teller, but I don’t need to see the future to know that I can design it anyway I want to.
This is my life. And what I choose to do with this one and only life is completely up to me.
And I’m choosing to put this behind me. This story is in the past, it’s no longer real. The truth of who I am and what I’m here to do is laid out before me. I choose to move toward it, because that’s the experience I desire to have.
I don’t have exclusive rights on this whole “live your own life” thing, you can do it too.
Let it go.
Suffering is completely optional.