Girlfriends talk. We share stuff… intimate stuff. We talk about our jobs, our family, our other friends, and our sex lives. We share the good, the bad, and the OMG’s of our lives.
I am baffled at the number of girlfriends I have that are not sure if they’ve ever had an orgasm.
So I want to set the record straight…
If you are not sure if you have ever had an orgasm –
YOU HAVEN’T.
Orgasms do not leave room for uncertainty. They don’t play coy – not even a little bit. Sometimes they’re subtle, but always obvious.
Orgasms are egotistical. They want to be felt, seen, and appreciated.
Most orgasms are the strong aggressive type. They don’t want to be mistaken for anything else.
They get loud and pushy. They cause your entire body to stop and take notice. They’ll be no pretending it didn’t happen… every cell in your body will know it made an appearance. And your brain will hold onto the memory of that feeling for as long as it possibly can.
Orgasms like to be the center of attention. They want to steal the show. And for encore performances they seize your vocal cords, cause your eyes to rollback, your head to spin, and your toes to curl.
Now if you aren’t sure if you’ve ever had one, odds are you have probably faked it on more than one occasion.
If you’re faking it – stop.
Here’s a few tips to help you get there:
- Relax – the most important part of pleasure is relaxation. Your body may respond to being aroused, but your brain is the control center. If you aren’t relaxed, your brain will not focus on the task at hand.
- Know your body – you are the only person who will ever know everything about you. Getting to know what feels good to you is essential. Explore every inch of your body. Discover your pleasure points. Share the intel with your partner to heighten the sexual experience.
- Take your time – perhaps your orgasm isn’t being elusive, maybe it just doesn’t like to be rushed. Make sure there is enough time to experience maximum stimulation. If you have to put pleasure on the calendar – do it.
You owe it to yourself to have a real orgasm. If you haven’t been able to go there with your partner, try it alone. Sex for one is fantastic! And it’s a great way to get to know what you like.
Orgasms are a gift from the Universe… and it’s impolite to decline a gift.
Just say thank you and indulge! (click to tweet)
Here are a couple of videos that explain the biology of how orgasms occur in males and females, if you’re curious.
This post is part of the “This is 40″blog series. Forty lessons. Forty weeks.